I was a bit morose this weekend despite (because of?) actually going out both Friday and Saturday nights ... Lori and I hung out with a Flaster on Friday, and it was a very Michiganesque experience, drinking in a bowling alley bar and discussing the collapse of civilization (best ways to build a compound into the side of a hill, which guns to stockpile, some real Michigan Militia-type shit and for a while I forgot I was out here in Fairyville). After wasting an entire Saturday, we went to a birthday party where I met a poet from England who was born in Missouri and tasted an excellent caramel cake. But I've been lacking for sleep and Lori and I are both concerned about our economic futures ... state budget cuts are threatening us and we may not be as comfortable as we are now by the end of the summer. These grim facts, along with my usual routine of self-doubt, paranoid fantasies and existential terror kept me pretty frozen overall. But it's a new day, God loves me, it's always darkest before the dawn and etc. etc., so what the fuck, I'll stay alive a couple more days and see what happens.

Looking for asian woman to stand and look pretty (craigslist.org)

"I have a 19 year old co-worker who is obsessed with all things Asian (anime, takes Kung fu, ect) but he wants to save his virginity for marriage so I want to torture him by having a very beautiful Asian girl come into the store and hit on him. He will be forced to refuse the advances of said Asian girl and it will be very funny to me. Email me if you are interested in my sick prank it's a quick easy way to make $100"

As a Kerrang! reader in the early/mid 1980s, I remember Anvil well ... not their music, though, in mid-Michigan back then their records would have only been available in specialty import shops at inflated prices and what little cash I had for metal in high school was usually spent on sure things like Slayer, Plasmatics, WASP, Motorhead and Venom. Upon learning of this upcoming doc, I checked out some vintage Anvil vids, and they're pretty dire, one of a million early-80s metal bands with energy, grit, clunky riffs and haphazard arrangements (judge for yourself down below). Still, I'm looking forward to the documentary, but I'll probably wait til it comes out on DVD so I don't have to sit in a theater full of smug Seattle assholes laughing at the hosers.

THE CURE FOR CANCER -- WE SHOULD ALL KNOW THIS.

Hate Crime In Seaside

Regarding our relaxing weekend in Seaside ... I'm pretty sure these guys were in the same restaurant as us on Saturday night. Next time we go to Manzanita.

One week from tonight. The Jewelbox Theater is an excellent room for The End Times, our shows there with the Mach 2 lineup sounded crisp and clear, and I expect the same to be true now that we're new and improved. So if you've considered catching us but haven't yet, next Tuesday's early evening performance is a fine option for lovers of full-night's-sleeps and drinking in empty rooms.

Be warned ... Pillow Army has a flautist now.

The Old Lady and I took a brief vacation over the weekend to the charming tourist trap town of Seaside, Oregon. A relaxing six hour drive, a walk on a windy beach, a room at a bed & breakfast run by a man in a neck brace, a fancy dinner at the kind of joint where all the food is piled up in the center of the plate, but for me the highlight was a candy store called The Buzz, where we bought half a pound of gummi fangs (pictured), a handful of Zotz, some European chocolate bars made with sugar and not high fructose corn syrup, a plus-sized candy necklace to commemorate a certain young lady's birthday, and a chocolate-covered Twinkie (which was, surprisingly, underwhelming -- they may have used a non-Hostess brand knock-off). There were also bubble gum cigarettes, bacon-flavored jelly beans and huge tubs of cotton candy, but I kept it cool. Seaside is like a small-scale Wisconsin Dells with an ocean shore instead of waterparks ... there are bumper cars, a carousel, an Olde Tyme Photo Shoppe and all the restaurants have infantile names (Yummys, Doogers, Pudgys, Pig & Pancake). We'll be returning as soon as possible.

The End Times snared another show, returning again to The Back Room @ Piecora's thanks to Jill C., this time playing with Llama (featuring Rusty Willoughby, who some may remember from grunge-era Seattle band Flop). It's Easter Eve, April 11th, so if you don't already have big big plans for the Resurrection, come watch us while you eat, like a TV.

I'm in an exceptional mood this morning, so to celebrate I am posting this photo of a girl in a Black Flag t-shirt, surely one of nature's most beautiful sights. Enjoy.

A good weekend. I drank well on Friday, slept well on Saturday and worked hard on Sunday (because it’s the Lord’s day, and that’s what He’ll be doing). I learned valuable lessons at the Little Red Hen, then spent my hangover rekindling dead fires until I was strong enough to get back to planning the war. We move westward, then head for Mexico ...

RED DETACHMENT OF WOMEN (1970)



From the Internet Archive: "One of the most powerful and moving ballets from the Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution. It depicts a woman's journey into the People's Liberation Army. Instead of weak, fragile women dressed in fluttery tutus, women were depicted in military uniforms with rifles. Instead of frail motions, women had strong arms and clenched fists. This play shook the entire foundation of bourgeois art."

Once in a while if you just hold your breath and peer closely at something it turns out that it isn't as dangerous as you thought it was.

This is punk.

In the news today ...

Alabama rampage leaves 11 dead.

15 dead in German school shooting.

Five human heads found in ice chests.

2 teachers accused of sex with same boy.

'Fight club' set up at school for mentally disabled, police say.

I also learned about vorarephilia today ... granted, I should have already guessed there was such a thing. Anyhow, YouTube has any number of videos devoted to it.

UPDATE: And then there's the "rape simulator." Good Lord.

I'm gonna go give up now. The rest of you can have this.

MARJOE (Original Soundtrack LP)
Born in 1944 to fundamentalist Christian parents, Marjoe Gortner became famous as a child prodigy preacher and faith healer, beginning his career at the age of four and thrilling the faithful across America with dramatic fire-and-brimstone lectures on the wages of sin and the glory of God. As he grew into a man, however, Gortner had to face the fact that, despite his gift for oratory, he didn't share the beliefs of his followers, so he burned his bridges with the Christian world but good by allowing a documentary film crew full access to the cynical behind-the-scenes world of professional religion. The resulting film, Marjoe, won an Oscar for Best Documentary in 1972, and regardless of one's religious convictions it remains a pithy lesson on the ease with which false prophets can exploit a gullible congregation. This soundtrack LP provides the audio portion of key scenes, including Gortner's memories of his youthful career ("I never really tripped out and thought that I was some real miracle child"), candid confessions of how and why faith healing seems to work, and his dynamic "Hell With the Lid Off" sermon delivered at age eight. Essentially, Gortner views the church meeting as nothing more than a stage from which to entertain, and when the filmmakers capture him in contemporaneous footage at Southern tent revivals, he's all flash and glitter, pumping his congregations up into fever pitches of religious fervor. What's remarkable is just how effective Gortner is as a preacher; even after he soberly explains the gimmicks and tricks he uses to extract an ecstatic reaction from his audience, it's easy to get caught up emotionally once the charismatic young man starts performing. There are also a handful of good country gospel performances from some of Gortner's fellow travelers, plus two raucous, life-affirming spirituals recorded live in Detroit by a singer named June Samuels. Though not as complete and edifying as the film itself, the Marjoe soundtrack LP is a unique document for spoken word enthusiasts. As for Gortner, he followed his muse into the entertainment world and went on to star in many low-budget action, horror, and sci-fi films, including Viva Knievel! and Food of the Gods.

Watch MARJOE here on documentary-log.com.

Last week's Comet performance marked six shows in two months for the revamped End Times lineup, and this relative marathon achieved the intended goals ... the band is tight, our brand is reestablished, and we're able to perform well in extreme conditions. Rambunctious sports bar, empty unheated room, or fully-attentive capacity crowd, we faced apathy and adoration with equal energy and I'm way proud. Essentially, we're right back where we left off a year ago, which might be nowhere, but at least the staircase out is visible again.

We do it next at the Jewelbox Theater on March 31st with (who else?) Pillow Army. The open weeks ahead are for learning new songs, preparing exploratory recordings and searching for a handler to help us organize and execute policy. The End Times is not a band that can DIY, at least not all of it, since the individual strengths that make the trio unique preclude us from excelling in any managerial roles. Abi spends all her time working out and investigating alternative beauty treatments to keep that gorgeous kisser of hers in order, and Tyson is busy keeping himself calm and collected, an extremely stressful endeavor to be sure and a sacrifice we all appreciate greatly. As for me, I must continue to pursue madness in all its forms, so that I can remain an open conduit for the spirit messages we communicate through song. The truth is never revealed to an ordered mind ... logic is for the worldly, and God has no interest in such things.

Anyhow, send up a flare if you want to join the war. There's money to be made and marks to be trimmed.

"Drum Set." This is pretty great. Via WFMU.