OK, Jesus Christ, now I need a beer. Mm, yeah, that's better. My unchecked anger got the best of me again about thirty minutes back. Finally getting my head together enough to send more writing samples out to new magazine prospects, and after a half hour of carefully crafting the perfect introduction letter and selecting the pieces that display my versatility, fuckin' Yahoo suddenly refuses to attach files to my email and erases what I had spent so much time on. I could blame the heat, the new job, the coffee, lots of things, but it doesn't matter, I screamed myself hoarse and punched a few walls. I've been much more level lately, but this kind of thing cuts me deep. I mean, if the TV reception is bad or I bite my lip, I've learned to deal with it ... but fuck ass motherfucker if something gets in the way of some responsible act that I've finally fought my way through the haze of melancholy to tackle. Another half hour down the line and I had achieved my goal, but I only have so many half hours left in my life, and even fewer of these occur when I have energy, peace and quiet and a spark of confidence.

I hate you all.

I've been obsessing over the abject selfishness of the modern world lately, pretty much every time I walk down the street and witness petty acts of negligence that would brand me a crank if I was ever to demonstrate the irritation they cause. But they all pile up, you morons, and that's exactly why lesser men lose their minds and commit themselves to killing sprees. Jaywalking, littering, aggressive driving, it sounds silly but all of our actions, no matter how mundane, cause ripples that affect our environment and our fellows. But some people apparently travel in a bubble that allows them to float along peacefully without regarding anyone else.

You wanna know why the rest of the world hates Americans so much? BECAUSE WE DESERVE IT. Or at least you do. YES, YOU!