Hello from Michigan, where everything is better.

My time here has not been spent in ease, I'm experiencing all the stresses I expected, mood swings and long hours of isolation, vague regrets of what might have been, more fear of the future than anticipation. Just in the past week I've developed some strange sleep disturbances, vivid dreams that wake me at irregular intervals and leave me wide eyed in the night. After four days of this, I'm feeling very shaky, so perhaps I should keep my mouth shut ... of course, I've had some good days and positive signs, but I'm anxious to find my place and I get more impatient with every year that gets crossed off that giant scoreboard in the sky, so I'm more uptight than not.

The good news is that Lori's job is going very well. The work is challenging, but her boss is the type who encourages long lunches and insists that Lori manage her own hours and make space for a life outside of the library. We've reconnected with some old friends, the kind where our understanding of each other is strong enough that not even decades, careers or children can fundamentally change who we are together. Also, cursory exploration of the Ann Arbor public library suggests that it's as good as Seattle ... I found Jandek CDs, the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, a fine selection of documentaries (did you know that the first working television network was run by the Nazis? Me neither) and I can only imagine they got some good readin' books too. The restaurants are also impressive, for the most part, bettering many of Seattle's better eateries -- they're often equally expensive, but Lori and I don't walk away disappointed like we did most of the time back West. Oh, and the beer ... Michigan harbors a number of excellent breweries so we do our best to buy locally, and I must attribute my recent weight gain (I'm nearly up to 170 lbs for the first time since Chicago) at least partially to Bell's, New Holland, Arbor and Short's.

However, the apartment we were forced to accept sight-unseen turned out to be a bit of a dump (no matter, it's only a three-month lease, we'll be moving shortly), we're having trouble with our new insurance and Ann Arbor happens to be the worst fucking city to drive in ever. Ever. Narrow roads, inconsistent bike lanes, a dearth of street signs, and you can't take left turns anywhere, it's a constant maze of U-turns and missed connections. Buses are not a convenient option, because this is Michigan, and we just don't do that here. I won't even start on the shrinking job market right now, because it wouldn't really be a sincere complaint, but eventually it's going to be a problem that will require a creative solution.

In a sudden fit of positive thinking, I placed an ad on craigslist for a new girl singer ... I did the same thing exactly a year ago in Seattle and got very, very lucky, so I'm hoping to strike oil again, perhaps a redhead this time? There have already been some responses, a few very promising and a few very not so, but of course I still feel like everything is moving too slowly, and I had such a great lineup in Seattle that it's going to take a miracle to come close. I hope to have better news soon. The End Times LP gets mixed and mastered at Ghetto two Tuesdays from now, so we'll be able to start infecting the rest of the world with the truth soon ... the world isn't likely to listen, but I want to make sure it can't say it wasn't told.

PS. Since it's a national day of mourning, I must reminisce, as it was eight years ago today that convinced me to move to Seattle in the first place. I had just been laid off from my Chicago dot com job and was extending an already-planned visit to Lori when the planes hit. I was so thankful to be near her during what I assumed was the beginning of total war against the country, rather than a thousand miles away and not knowing which of our cities would be destroyed first, that I completely abandoned tentative plans I had to stay and work in the Midwest where I still had some writing opportunities ... if America was finally going to get what was coming to her, I wanted to be by Lori's side, and I have been ever since. Bring it on.